Friday, 6 May 2016

Organ Donation, Eyes and Zombies: A Quick Trip Through My Brain

So, I was just listening to a podcast about the Resurrection Men and the stealing of cadavers for doctors and surgeons to dissect (cheerful, I know), when my brain got completely derailed and went for its own little ride. It went some weird places, and I'm going to share them with you lucky people.

And so it begins...

"I had a donors card at one point. I wonder where that went. I wonder if Toben knows. I should tell him that when I get home.

I think I checked all the boxes. Oh. Maybe I didn't check the eyes box. Yes yes, that probably freaked past me out. Dems are mine. You cannot has. Yeah, that rings bells.

Huh. Present me doesn't seem so fussed. Did I read somewhere that eyes are the least donated thing because people feel all weirdy beardy about it? Yeah... yeah... YEAH! I did read that somewhere.

Maybe I should change that. Maybe someone should have them. I sure won't be using them.


What if there was a zombie apocalypse once I'm dead? Surely I'd need them then. Ha! Can you imagine, blind zombie me walking into things and knocking things over... nobody would tell the difference.

Wait. Which side am I on?

Am I on team zombie or team human? Huh. Well I am a human, and all the people I know would be fighting the zombies. I'd be cheering for them. If it was a zombie film and they were the characters I would be hoping they all make it.

Apart from That Guy. There's always a That Guy, who gets killed about halfway through and everyone is kind of relieved because he was a giant pain in the derriere.

And I guess I might be watching like it is some kind of film, I don't know where I'll be. Hmm.

So would I be hoping that somebody takes zombie me out with a hatchet? It would still look like me. But all zombie-fied. That would be weird.

And what if the hidden bunker of the world's best scientists made a cure, and all the zombies became people again? Then zombie me would be me again. I'd need my eyes then. If a cure was going to happen I'd want zombie me to have the best chance of surviving till then, and you'd really need eyes for that.

But surely for zombie me to be me again, it would need to have been me the whole time. Woah. I'd have to be in there all crazy and wanting brains. Oh jeez.


I don't really know what just happened, but I better write this down."